Category: Uncategorized Page 5 of 7

My Favorite Ghost Stories

On April 29, 2017

In authors, ghost stories, Novels, Uncategorized

One thing about being an author is you never know what ideas will pop into your head. I was driving home from work a few weeks ago and I heard a song on the radio. The song started my mind down a certain train of thought. By the time I got home, I had a fully formed idea for a novel. After dinner, I went out by the pool with a clipboard, crashed into a chaise lounge chair and completed a 4 Act Plot Chart for a YA novel involving a MC who isn’t still living. This is a huge departure for my writing, but so far I’m enjoying this work in progress and just passed the 6K word mark.

Anyone who knows me, will understand this isn’t a scary story. I don’t do horror in any shape or form. In fact, I’m a huge chicken when it comes to scary books or movies. Beginning this new project made me start thinking about my favorite books and movies that involve ghosts of any kind. Some of them are mildly scary, but certainly not horrifically so. So, without further ado, here’s a list of my favorites.

Ghost. What’s not to love about this 1990 movie with Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore? It’s got all the emotions you want to see in a romance, plus the comedic element added by Whoopi Goldberg (who completely nails the role of the psychic Swayze nags into agreeing to help him). You’ll laugh, cry, scream at the screen, and even swoon at the famous pottery wheel scene.
Image copyright Warner Brothers Studios
A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens. This classic tale has been retold many ways over the 100+ years since it was released, but it’s never lost its punch. This great exchange at the very beginning of the novel between Ebenezer Scrooge and his nephew is just a tiny example of the wit evidenced in this book:

“A merry Christmas, uncle! God save you!” cried a cheerful voice. It was the voice of Scrooge’s nephew, who came upon him so quickly that this was the first intimation he had of his approach.
“Bah!” said Scrooge, “Humbug!”
He had so heated himself with rapid walking in the fog and frost, this nephew of Scrooge’s, that he was all in a glow; his face was ruddy and handsome; his eyes sparkled, and his breath smoked again.
“Christmas a humbug, uncle!” said Scrooge’s nephew. “You don’t mean that, I am sure?”
“I do,” said Scrooge. “Merry Christmas! What right have you to be merry? What reason have you to be merry? You’re poor enough.”
“Come, then,” returned the nephew gaily. “What right have you to be dismal? What reason have you to be morose? You’re rich enough.”
Scrooge having no better answer ready on the spur of the moment, said, “Bah!” again; and followed it up with “Humbug.”
“Don’t be cross, uncle!” said the nephew.
“What else can I be,” returned the uncle, “when I live in such a world of fools as this? Merry Christmas! Out upon merry Christmas! What’s Christmas time to you but a time for paying bills without money; a time for finding yourself a year older, but not an hour richer; a time for balancing your books and having every item in ’em through a round dozen of months presented dead against you? If I could work my will,” said Scrooge indignantly, “every idiot who goes about with ‘Merry Christmas’ on his lips, should be boiled with his own pudding, and buried with a stake of holly through his heart. He should!”

Does it get any better than this? Haha. Boiled in his own pudding? But this novel isn’t all humor. There are poignant lessons learned by Scrooge that can benefit us all to this day. * Note: The link above directs you to a free copy of the novel online through The Gutenberg Project.
The Sixth Sense. Oh this movie…sigh. I loved it. I dragged my husband to see it a second time because I just couldn’t believe we’d miss the signs that could have led us to figure out the big plot twist before it happened. And yes, on the second viewing it was much more obvious. 🙂 But what I loved about this movie was the heart of the MC, and his relationships with child psychologist Bruce Willis and his Mom. The scene in the car with his mom where he recounts for her something his grandma told him will cause an ugly cry instantly.
Image copyright Buena Vista Studios

4. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold. I knew nothing about this book when I began reading it, but by the end it had a powerful hold on me. As a pediatric nurse, I’ve experienced first hand the devastating effects losing a child can have on a family. Even as a child dies, he/she worries about the sadness of the parents. A child viewing the post-mortem disaster her family becomes in the wake of her death makes for a gripping novel. It’s a parent’s worst nightmare in more ways than one.

Copyright Random House

5. Casper the Friendly Ghost. Admittedly, this one goes back to watching the cartoon as a child (and reading the comics!). It was comforting to think of ghosts as friendly and childlike. Nothing like the scary ghosts of my teen years, like the ones found in The Shining or Poltergeist. My sister was always terrified of ghosts, but I never have been. But like I said earlier, I’m a chicken so I avoid reading or watching scary ghost stories if I can help it. 🙂 Casper is my kind of ghost!

I’m sure I could think of more favorites, but I need to get back to working on my own ghost story. As a writer, you have to write never knowing for sure if your story will see the light of day. So you’ve got to love what you do. If you have favorite ghost stories, I’d love for you to comment and share them. Thanks.

A Tiny Superhero with a Huge Heart

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On March 27, 2017

In authors, disability, diversity, nursing, Superhero, Uncategorized

guardians-of-the-galaxy-2-baby-groot-jumpsuit

Baby Groot from Guardians of the Galaxy 2 (Marvel) takes down a much bigger bad guy! Copyright Walt Disney Motion Picture Studios.

I have always loved characters that surprise me. Especially if that character is a child that no one expects to do great things. This character is found in all of my favorite books by Roald Dahl–unloved, orphaned, tiny, impoverished–whatever the reason, the world at large has low expectations for the character. And then, our scrappy little kid goes on to prove the world was completely mistaken and we learn that he/she is truly amazing.

In my recently completed picture book manuscript, my main character is certainly not the kid anyone would expect to be a superhero capable of stopping a notorious super villain in his tracks. But that is exactly what he does. My character was born with a disability that required him to have a tracheostomy tube placed in his neck to help him breathe. But don’t count him out just yet. He’s packing a hidden punch.

As a pediatric nurse, I’ve been awed and inspired countless times by the enormity of courage packed into tiny little bodies. Kids are my passion, and writing stories that show their powers (in ways the world doesn’t expect) is more fun than should be legal. I hope that one day this story will make it out into the world and you can share in the fun of watching my tiny little guy with the huge heart take down the bad guys. Until then, Google some videos of Baby Groot in action for a guaranteed smile!

A Look at Childhood Poverty

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On February 6, 2017

In Family Life, Novels, parenting, Uncategorized

bk_stea2

Several years ago when I taught fourth grade, I attended a training on childhood poverty. We were each handed a tool to measure how comfortable we were doing various tasks. The questions were things like, “Would you know how to cash a check without a bank account?” and “Could you organize a formal function for 300 guests with a seating chart?” I don’t remember what the exact questions were, but when I was finished and was told how to “score” my inventory, it revealed that I was solidly middle class. How could this assessment measure my social class? It simply looked at the tasks that I felt I could easily accomplish. I felt completely comfortable performing tasks that middle class Americans tend to perform on a regular basis, and because of this “comfort zone”, I was categorized as middle class.

Why is this important? Because most teachers in America come from a middle class background. It’s what they know. It’s where they are comfortable. It’s what they understand. Therefore, when planning lessons, assigning homework, holding conferences with parents and interacting with students, the teachers are viewing each situation through a “middle-class lens.”Through this workshop, it became apparent to me that the very way I perceive the world, react to situations, evaluate objects and behave are all tied to my socioeconomic level.

And this is fine if I’m teaching in a school where my students all have the same perceptions and experiences. But what about when we have students who live in poverty? When assigning homework and projects, don’t I make the assumption that my students will have pencils, crayons, paper and electricity? And to be honest, don’t we tend to assume that a student will have a parent to help them? Because we help our kids and our own parents helped us. This is where we can run into trouble.

The book, How to Steal a Dog, offers readers a glimpse into what life is like for a child living in poverty. Even though Georgina’s family has lost their apartment (after being abandoned by her father), life goes on for them. Her mom still has to work and the kids still have to go to school. They live in their car with no assurance of safety, no comfort, and no real hope that things will get better any time soon. Georgina’s teacher isn’t aware of her changed circumstances and makes incorrect assumptions.

I highly recommend this book. Read it yourself and read it with your kids. It offers a wonderful insight into what life is like for families living in poverty. Families who are hit with unexpected setbacks or tragedies that change their circumstances in the blink of an eye. If you’ve read this book, I’d love to hear what you think. Also, if you’re a teacher with experience teaching children who live in poverty, please reach out and let me know of your experiences.

Photo Credit: FS&G, 2007. Frances Foster Books

What I’ve Learned Reading My Grandma’s Journal

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On February 1, 2017

In parenting, Uncategorized

The first page of Grandma’s journal in 1933

My heart soared when I read the first line of Grandma’s journal. “Today has been perfect.” Wow, what could be better? She was 28 years old, married to the love of her life and a new mother. But on the very same page, I read how scared she was to think of her little boy ever being sick. Fast forward 20 years, and that beautiful young man was dead from brain cancer which struck him during his first year of college. Reading the intimate thoughts of a person I’d loved so dearly was an emotional roller coaster. However, I learned some lessons from her words that I want to share.

My grandparents loved each other. Almost daily, she expressed her gratitude for the wonderful man she’d married. I delighted in reading of my grandpa coming home from duty at the Naval Hospital in Rhode Island where they were stationed and helping wash and fold diapers, cook dinner, clean dishes or anything else to help make things easier for my grandma. So much for my preconceived notions of gender roles of American couples in the 1930s!
They helped their families no matter what. Even in the midst of a depression and a cut in my grandpa’s navy salary, they sent bi-monthly checks to help siblings go to school and sent money to help her parents “make ends meet” each month. They would drive 2 hours to provide respite care to in-laws who were caregivers for an elderly parent. Many times over the months chronicled in her journal, my grandma wished she could help even more and expressed worry for her family members.
Bank were literally closed. After mention several times of bank closures, I went and looked it up. Sure enough, in an effort to restore confidence in American banks (by keeping people from rushing the banks to remove their money) FDR closed banks for a period of time. Many times she wrote of uncertainty about the future and worried how they’d manage.
Some things never change! Certain emotions and sentiments are universal. Over the course of these months, Grandma expressed her frustration with “politicians in Washington”, her hopes for the future, her love for her child and spouse, and her gratitude for it all.
President Roosevelt was almost assassinated. I probably read this in a text book years ago, but I’d obviously forgotten it. Grandma mentioned her brother going to Washington for the inauguration of FDR (which strangely was in March, not January) but also expressed her shock that a month earlier someone had tried to kill him. Sure enough, back to the Internet I went, and discovered that when he was still President-elect, a man in Miami fired shots at him.
They used funny expressions in the ’30s! I learned that “plum caflooey” means an awful lot of something and that if you’ve “fallen off the roof” it’s time to stock up on feminine supplies for the month. Also, if a person is “prickly”, you may just want to give them some space. I’m sure there are more, but these are the ones that jumped out at me. 🙂

Jane, Austin and Bobby Walter

If you have the chance to read a journal of a loved one, please do. It was such a treasure to me and it creates the desire to leave words for my future grandchildren to read.

The Song of the Valley Dweller

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On January 23, 2017

In authors, Novels, Uncategorized

Have you ever been to a place that has captivated you? A place with the spirit of an enchantress? Somewhere you want to stay forever? I’ve been fortunate enough to spend many hours in such a place. Nestled in the Blue Ridge Mountains of North Georgia is a tiny valley that most people have never heard of- but if you’ve been there, you’re not likely to forget. It oozes with charm and a level of serenity that will almost convince you that you’ve stepped back in time.

My great-grandfather, Dr. John Coit, was captivated by the Nacoochee Valley. The views he saw all around him–mountains, streams, rivers, granite cliffs, waterfalls, sunsets, etc., inspired him to pen a poem titled, The Song of the Valley Dweller. It is a beautiful love story, written for a place, rather than a lover. The last two stanzas of the poem read:

Fair Nacoochee, Vale of beauty,

Thou has won my very heart,

All my love is gladly given,

For a smile of love thou art.

Lynch, Tallulah, Tray, and Yonah,

May thy circling summits high,

Ever guard this charming valley,

As the years pass swiftly by.

Then if I should fail to hear Him,

And these hand should folded be.

And this heart must cease its labor

Ere the Master’s face I see;

Then may those who know and love me,

Come and lay me close to rest

By the bright streams of Nacoochee,

Near the hills I love the best.

J.K. Coit, May 1922

Years after these words were inscribed as a tribute to the valley, his adopted daughter (my grandmother) moved there with her family. My grandfather became the only doctor in the valley and treated patients in a room converted into his office. The house, with its wrap-around porch and mountain views, was enticing enough to inspire someone in a NYC office to select an image shot from that very porch as the cover of the New York Times best selling novel, The Notebook.

the_notebook_cover

The 1800’s era farmhouse comes complete with ghost stories, Native American legends, and a sleeping porch upstairs with full windows on 3 sides. Lucky for my own family, and others who’d love to experience these majestic views for themselves, the house operates as a Bed and Breakfast named, The Stovall House .

If you do get a chance to stop in, I’d love to hear about it. Also, if you have a place in this world that has captivated you the way this valley has captivated me and so many others before me, please let me know.

What I Love about R.J. Palacio’s “Wonder”

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On September 12, 2016

In disability, discrimination, diversity, Family Life, Novels, parenting, Uncategorized

Penguin Random House Books

I finished reading Wonder in March, but I can’t stop thinking about this book. I’ve recommended it to more people than I can keep track of. The ones who’ve read it get back to me and thank me for recommending it. The book is just that good. This book resonated with me for several reasons. First, I grew up in a family with a sister who had special needs. I also have a son with special needs. I’m a pediatric nurse who’s cared for children with the same kind of anomalies that the main character was born with. Finally, I taught elementary school for 4 years and high school for 1, and Ms. Palacio nails school dynamics beautifully.

If you haven’t read this wonderful book yet, here is a brief introduction: August Pullman has never been able to attend school due to his extensive medical needs. He was born with severe craniofacial anomalies, and has had many surgeries. At the opening of the story, his parents have decided to enroll him in a private school. Auggie is nervous about how the other kids are going to respond to him. The principal picks three kids that he thinks will help ease the transition for Auggie, but it doesn’t work out so well. (It’s more complicated than that, but I don’t want to give spoilers!) However, there is another student named Summer who befriends Auggie without prompting from anyone. Through the narrative, the reader becomes a part of the Pullman family as well as their extended family and friends.

The story unfolds through multiple perspectives. Even though Auggie is an extremely observant kid, there is no way he could know the motivations and back story for every other character in the book. Palacio beautifully puts us inside the head of each character, and this is one of the reasons this book has such a huge heart. No one is a cliché, but a fully developed character with motivations guiding their behaviors.
The book is written with humor. Even though I cried in many places, this book is not in the least bit depressing. The Pullman family relies on humor to get them through the tough times. I came to love this family so much. They made mistakes and they didn’t always agree. But they loved each other and it comes across so beautifully in the writing.
The beautiful writing itself makes the book a pleasure to read. In the very beginning of the book, Auggie tells us, “the only reason I’m not ordinary is that no one else sees me that way.” He is perceptive and notices the way others react to him. He also shares at one point that if he had a magic lamp, he’d wish for an ordinary face. Being inside of Auggie’s head doesn’t feel like a pity party. But the frustration he feels that even his own family doesn’t seem to be able to allow him to be “normal” comes across beautifully. It’s gut wrenching, but at the same time it’s hopeful.
Via’s experiences were the ones that resonated the strongest for me because this teenage character is able to put her family’s existence into words better than I’ve ever been able to. When it’s Via’s turn to tell the story, she compares her family to a solar system. “August is the Sun. Me and Mom and Dad are planets orbiting the Sun. The rest of our family and friends are asteroids and comets floating around the planets orbiting the Sun.” Wow.
Another beautiful part of Wonder that was especially meaningful for me was the relationship between Via and her grandmother. In her early years, having her grandmother’s unconditional love and adoration helped to offset the dynamics of her nuclear family. My grandmother was exactly this for me. And just like Via, she died unexpectedly when I needed her support the most. Via’s grandmother shares a secret with her about why she feels the way she does. “I love Auggie very, very much,…but he has many angels looking out for him already, Via. And I want you to know that you have me looking out for you.”
This book is “real” in every since. Palacio doesn’t sugar coat anything. She allows Auggie to be resentful of “normal” kids at times. Via feels betrayed by her mom at times when she focuses so much attention on Auggie and his needs. The parents have arguments. Some kids are just plain mean, because let’s be honest, some kids just are. Perhaps the best part of the authenticity of Wonder is that is shows how acts of kindness that might seem small at the time, can have an enormous impact on someone who needed the kindness. In fact, this book started the Choose Kind movement through American schools.

To say that I recommend this book is an understatement. If you haven’t read it, you can go here for more information from the book’s publisher. If you have read it, please share your comments. I’d love to hear from you.

Dragon Con 2016

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On September 10, 2016

In authors, Cosplay, disability, diversity, Dragon Con, Novels, Uncategorized

14258341_1059995614114591_5414256662795664782_o

I was fortunate enough to attend my first Dragon Con last weekend in Atlanta with my family. This was the 30th anniversary of the pop culture, fantasy, and sci-fi convention, and I was joined by more than 77,000 others on this adventure. According the the post- convention press release, “Fans came from around the world and all 50 states, with this year’s convention attracting people from as far away as Japan, New Zealand, and Fiji.” In other words, I was in good company.

What I knew about Dragon Con is that people engaged in cosplay–dressing up as their favorite characters from movies, comics, television programs, video games, and just about anything that reflects their interests. I knew this because I’ve assisted my young adult kids in making these costumes and/or purchasing items to make them look authentic. I vaguely knew that they held panels for people interested in writing because my daughter, who volunteered this year in media relations at the con, had told me about them last year.

What I didn’t know about Dragon Con could fill Lake Michigan. Here’s just a few facts that I found impressive.

The con has it own awards/recognition program called Dragon Awards. These recognize the creators of science fiction and fantasy in books, comic books, games and filmed entertainment.
The con raises money for charity. According to the press release, $98,000 was raised this year for its 2016 official charity, the Atlanta Center for Self Sufficiency, which helps put homeless individuals on a pathway to achieving a healthy independence.
The con attracts famous actors, writers, producers, etc. There was some serious talent in that place. There are far too many to name, but a few of the individuals that I’ve watched in television during my lifetime were in attendance such as Alex Kingston, William Shatner, Gillian Anderson, and Jason Isaacs and Adam Baldwin. There was a pool of talent at the con that would appeal to people of all ages and interests.
The sheer size of the con! I mentioned the numbers above, but nothing would prepare you for how many individuals (costumed or not) were crowded into a huge area of Atlanta. Event organizers added more than 215,000 square feet to the venues, including the AmericasMart Building 2. The con consumed meeting space in the Sheraton, Marriott Marquis, Westin, Hyatt and the AmericasMart buildings.
The con is quite civic minded. In addition to the fundraising efforts, there was a blood drive held in which over 6,000 units of blood and blood products were donated to an Atlanta blood bank. Also, disability services were visible everywhere and provided assistance to individuals with special mobility/seating needs.
The diversity of the people attracted by Dragon Con was one of my biggest surprises. There were people there who were less than half my age as well as people (almost!) twice my age. There were people there of every race, gender and socioeconomic level. Some costumes were Captain America shirts from Walmart and some looked professionally made to the cost of thousands. The attendees for the most part were gracious with posing for pictures, and seemingly unflustered by the long (and I mean long!) lines, wait times and sheer crowds you had to part to just move anywhere. I loved seeing families there with their kids, all in costume having a great time.
I’m saving the best for last. 🙂 I was stunned at the writing community that was in attendance. There were some terrific panels at the con on the writing craft as well as specific elements of publishing. Brandon Sanderson, who is probably best known for finishing Robert Jordan’s epic fantasy series, The Wheel of Time, was on a panel that I attended. I ran into him outside of one of the hotels and he was warm and gracious in answering a question and then chatting for several minutes. The authors who attended seemed very willing to interact and share insights with attendees. I was impressed with the breadth of options of panels to attend that focused on writing.

My takeaway from Dragon Con 2016 is that there is truly something for everyone there. If you’ve ever read or watched anything related to science fiction or fantasy, if you’ve ever watched superhero movies or read comics, if you enjoy art or especially if you like people watching–this is the place to be during Labor Day weekend in Atlanta.

Have you been to Dragon Con or think you might be interested? If so, I’d love to hear your comments! For more information on Dragon Con 2017, please visit the website www.dragoncon.org for more information. You can also follow them on Facebook and Twitter.

Photo Credits: Sarah Maney

Leaving a Kid (and part of your heart) at College

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On August 21, 2016

In parenting, Uncategorized

So, it’s that time of year again. My Facebook feed is filled with posts and pictures of my dear friends leaving their kids at college. So much goes into that big day as any parent knows. I’ve been there and done that twice and it wasn’t easy either time. And endless loop of thoughts played through my head each time. Did I teach her/him enough? Does she/he know what to do in an emergency? What if she/he gets homesick but doesn’t call home?

My son has Asperger’s and we had to leave him at Georgia Tech in Atlanta. It was huge, busy, loud, and so terribly far from me. His mom. No one else knew him like me. But who was I to deny him his shot at this dream to go to Georgia Tech? Has it been easy? Heck no! That first year almost killed us both. But tomorrow he begins his junior year and he is still a Yellow Jacket through and through.

Flashback to 1986. What do you know? My mom felt the same way. She shared with me this journal entry that she wrote the day I started college. She gave me permission to include it in my blog.

I left her today.

So brave. So full of determination.

She’s waited so long for this day.

It has been so long coming and there has been so much pain along the way.

But now.

She stands perched on the brink of her future.

Eager, and just a little bit afraid.

She’s a college student at last.

I have to admit I got a bit choked up when I read my mom’s words written about me. She knew me much better than I gave her credit for.

Here’s to fresh starts and new beginnings. To every college student and college parent out there tonight, just know that you’re not alone. You’re in good company. Go out there and knock ’em dead kids!

tumblr_inline_mun42kbvsZ1rnvwt1

photo credit for gif image. Odyssey Online

Pitch Wars Bio

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On July 6, 2016

In Uncategorized

For my regular blog subscribers, this post is for the Pitch Wars community. But you might decide it’s worth the read anyway…. 😉

Hi Pitch Wars people, I’m Melissa and I would need about 20 lifetimes to experience everything that I want to! My bucket list could stretch from New York to California. Luckily my husband, kids and extended family just roll with it. My family is pretty cool and we were lucky enough to spend three years living in Europe where we traveled during basically every spare minute we had.

c1b29805ac97b09822d969e16a115625

I’ve had a hard time deciding on a career because I want to do so many different things, but I’ve narrowed it down to 3. My undergrad degree is in Nursing and I’ve been a pediatric nurse for about 25 years, but I also love to teach so I went ahead and got a Masters in Education and taught fourth grade for a few years. Finally, I write books– which is incredibly fun and has brought some fabulous people into my life. However, when it comes to how to find an agent and enter into the traditional publishing world, I feel about like this:

you know nothing

My mom didn’t name me Grace for an excellent reason. I’m a complete klutz, and growing up in the south, I heard, “Bless your heart!” quite a bit. I’m pretty sure I have nine lives though because I’ve almost died about that many times–for real. I sledded under a barbed-wire fence, jumped from a thirty foot cliff into a small pool of water and missed all the rocks, was drug by the ankle under a horse running to the barn, spared by seconds from an inferno caused by a Sterno can flung into my Girl Scout tent at camp….I think you get the idea! It was probably Karma for teaching my kid brother how to fake unconsciousness to scare our teenage babysitters. My mom never could figure out why no one wanted to come back.

twilight

The book I’m entering into Pitch Wars is my first MG book. I wrote it during NaNoWriMo this past November and have been revising/editing and getting feedback from CPs on it ever since. The title of the novel is SPARE PARTS, which comes from a cruel nickname that my MC is labeled with by a bully. Here’s a little snippet.

During her older sister’s ‎Quinceañera, eleven year old Esperanza (Espy) overhears a conversation that makes her wonder if her parents are keeping secrets from her. When her sister is diagnosed with an aggressive leukemia, Espy finally learns the truth: this is not the first time her sister Valerie has been sick. In fact, she had been conceived to save her sister’s life. Espy is filled with doubts, but knows she must be courageous and resourceful to help her family survive their latest crisis. She faces down judgmental critics of her parents’ decision, school and Internet bullies, her fears of medical procedures involving huge needles and plunges herself into doing whatever it takes to save Valerie’s life a second time. If she fails, she might lose her sister forever.

My years of Pediatric ICU nursing combined with my years of teaching elementary school give me a unique background to write Espy’s story. If a mentor picks me, he or she should know that I have thick skin (think crocodile thick!) and am not afraid of criticism. In every job I seek out mentors, and writing is no different. I welcome the expertise! I’m a member of SCBWI and recently attended a writer’s intensive on writing middle grade literature. I entered a YA Contemporary manuscript last year during Pitch Wars and did get one request for a full. It was a great experience and I’m excited to get back into it this year with a shiny new manuscript.

There’s no point in telling you what I like to read, because I read basically everything. 🙂 If anyone took the time to read this entire post..THANK YOU!! 🙂 I’ll include you in my will. You might want to read some other cool bios too! Click HERE to do that.

Follow me on Twitter: @MelissaJMiles

Please don’t think discrimination doesn’t exist just because you don’t see it

By Melissa Johnston Miles

On May 3, 2016

In disability, discrimination, diversity, parenting, Uncategorized

In many ways, getting older is about as appealing as extensive dental work without Novocaine. However, there is one aspect of approaching fifty that I’m grateful for, and that is the increased realization that my view of the world is largely limited to my own experiences. I see the world through my personal lenses, and the world reacts to me by what it sees: forty-something, middle class, educated, white, etc. How do I change the narrow way in which I view the world? It’s actually pretty simple, and yet so many people refuse to do it. Just listen to the people who face discrimination every single day and allow yourself a glimpse into their lives. Why is this so hard for people? Because when we aren’t the object of discrimination, it’s easy not to see it as a problem. The knee-jerk reaction is to either get defensive, or else just deny the existence of the issue entirely.

Old Navy (Photo from Twitter)

This morning, The Today Show had a segment on a Tweet from Old Navy that featured a beautiful family. Apparently there are some outraged Twitter users who are refusing to go into Old Navy stores again because they chose to feature this couple. I was honestly surprised that this image would cause any kind of uproar. But it illustrates the point that I made above. My husband and I are from the same racial background. I’m sure if we weren’t, or if one of our young adult children decided to marry someone of a different race, we would all be acutely aware of the fact that people living among us in 2016 still react this strongly to the issue on interracial marriage. Even though it still saddens me (because I just can’t understand how this family is hurting anyone in any way), at least seeing this blurb on TV educates me to what interracial families deal with.

Our son has Asperger’s, which causes him to feel set apart from society in many ways. Imagine him at the age of twelve (as if middle school isn’t hard enough) being told by his church pastor that he couldn’t participate in the confirmation class being offered because she thought, “he wasn’t ready.” There was another middle school aged child in the class, but he wasn’t allowed. We pleaded with the church pastor on two separate occasions to allow him to be a part of the class, explaining how excluded he felt. But this woman, with all of her lofty ideals about inclusion, didn’t see any problem. To her it was evidently completely acceptable to exclude him. As a parent, this was heartbreaking and we no longer attend this church. But until the world makes an effort to understand what it is like not to process sensory information normally, to be unable to determine a person’s meaning from a facial expression or their body language, this type of discrimination will keep going on.

Also within the past week, I read a blog by a mom whose son is in a wheelchair. It was heartbreaking to think of her little boy stuck in his chair watching the other kids run and play. Even though I’m a pediatric nurse and I’ve taken care of children in wheelchairs, I had never put myself in the position of one of these precious children or their parents. I found a blog with images of a playground in Australia that has the great swing featured in the image below. My favorite part was a sign mounted at the entrance that said, “Access for All.” Whether we have a child in our lives with this need or not, we should all be aware of the problem and support these types of play areas. One amazing little girl I’ve taken care of in the past was excluded from almost every preschool in the area because her “disability” made her a liability. Until she is old enough to enter the public school system, her parents are at the mercy of private programs and how far they will stretch themselves to give her a place to participate in a school environment.

Sir James Mitchell Park in Perth, Australia

I’ll apologize in advance if this blog sounded preachy. It isn’t meant to be. But, I’d love to see everyone make a conscious effort to view life through the lens of others who are different than us. We’ve all heard that expression about walking a mile in someone else’s moccasins. It’s taken from a poem by Mary T. Lathrap. I’ll end this post with her words in the opening lines.

Pray, don’t find fault with the man that limps,
Or stumbles along the road.
Unless you have worn the moccasins he wears,
Or stumbled beneath the same load.